One Liners

Q. What did the blonde say when she saw the banana peel on the floor?
A. Oh no, I’m going to fall again!

Q. How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
A. Tell her a joke on Wednesday.

Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
A. You can’t, they have always been like that.

Q: Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
A: To see what was on the other side.

Q. How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A. Write ‘Please turn over’ on both sides of a piece of paper.

Q. What do twenty blondes standing ear to ear make?
A. A wind tunnel.

Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
A. Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.

Q. How does a blonde try to kill a fish?
A. She drowns it.

Q. How does a blonde part their hair?
A. By doing the splits.

Q. A blonde is going to London on a plane. How can you steal her window seat?
A. Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.

Q. Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A. Because that’s where your supposed to wash vegetables.

Q. What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
A. Frosted Flakes

Q. How did the blonde burn her nose?
A. Bobbing for chips.

Q. Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
A. You get to park in the handicap zone.

Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A. Pull the pin and throw it back.

Q. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
A. Artificial intelligence.

Q. Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice?
A. Cause it said concentrate.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde’s been using the computer?
A: There’s white-out on the screen.

Q. What is a brunette between two blondes?
A. An interpreter.

Q. Did you hear about the blonde that needed gas money?
A. She sold her car for it…

Q. What do you call a blond with a brain?
A. A golden retriever.

Q. What do you call a blonde in the closet?
A. The 1984 hide and go seek champion.

Q. How can you tell that a blonde sent you a fax?
A. It has a stamp on it.

Q. How do you drown a blonde?
A. Put a scratch ‘n sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

Q. Hear about the blonde that bought an AM radio?
A. It took her a month to figure out she could play it at night too

Q: What do you call a blonde in an institution of higher learning?

A: A visitor!

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?

A: Gifted!

Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde’s head?

A: A Space Invader!

Q: What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case?

A: Branch Manager!

Q: What do you call a smart blond?

A: A golden retriever!

Q: What do you see when you look into a blonde’s eyes?

A: The back of her head!

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